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The Family Factor Blog

December 2020

11/30/2020

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Covid-ing with Kids
It’s time to quiet the noise and listen to your internal parenting voice. Right now the amount of external noise is deafening and you might even be finding yourself feeling “normal” in these abstractly abnormal times. Let’s get you back to center. 
Close your eyes
  • When you think of your child where do you feel them?
    • In your heart?
    • In your chest?
    • In your womb?
    • In your mind?
  • Think of a problem you are having right now
    • COVID
    • Politics
    • Social distancing
    • Fear of failure
    • School 
    • Work 
    • Holidays
    • Social norms
    • Environmental stresses
    • Racial disagreement
    • Loneliness
    • Feeling crowded
    • Overwhelm
    • Addiction
    • Your mental health
    • Your physical health
  • Where do you feel this problem, this pain?
    • In your stomach?
    • In your back? 
    • In your heart?
    • In your chest?
    • In your throat?
    • In your mind?
  • Now think of yourself and think of your child, hold that space for them and hold that space for you. Focus on the area you are holding that pain. 
    • What happens? Do you immediately start thinking about solving the problem? Where do these “solutions” come from?
      • Within you
      • External input
      • Facebook forums and polls
      • Friend’s and Family input
      • Your partners advice
      • Your mothers advice
      • Your fathers advice
      • Your child’s school/camp
  • Now take three deep breaths and I want you to clear your mind. Envision your baby, your tiny new infant, cradled in your arms, sleeping and squeaking and smelling perfectly. Hold that image, hold that moment when everything was right there, exactly as it should be. I want you to hold that space and I want you to invite your problem area in. I want you to allow both your child and the problem to exist within you….
    • Now I want you to write down/say/hold in thought the first solution that comes to you. 
      • Why this answer?
      • Where did it come from?
      • It is simple or complicated?
      • Is it from you or from others?
This exercise is meant to be a practice of holding space, there is no right or wrong. It is meant to re-focus your worry, pinpoint the pressure points in your thoughts and in your physical being and bring an awareness to how we can get caught up in a moment and take control of that moment simultaneously.
A reminder that once upon a time (or perhaps this time for you is now) this perfect little being, in this perfect moment in time was overwhelming, engulfing and absolutely strengthening. Right now the world is overwhelming and the external static that fills the empty space of our mind is blinding and deafening.  This moment in time is also overwhelming, engulfing and absolutely strengthening. 


You are a parent and YOU are stronger than you know. 
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    I am a mother, not a wizard. I share what is hard, what is scary and what is real. The rest I leave to you. 

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